He convinced me to stop taking my antidepressants. He said I didn't need them, that I had been fooled by the doctors and «big pharma», that I was gullible. He harassed me with this issue for weeks, months. I stopped taking them because I couldn't take the pressure anymore. My condition was getting worse. During this time, he would see my parents and my friends without my knowledge and tell them that I was refusing to take my medication and that he was worried about my mental health.

He was trying to discourage me in my studies and he would make comments : «Why do you keep studying in that field, you're not really cut out for that kind of work. You're wasting your time».  When I had to study, he was constantly bothering me, convincing me to go out, pressuring me to stop working on my papers and spend time with him.

Despite the fact that we had been separated for 10 years, he still had regular contact with my family, despite the fact that I had already asked him to stop doing so. He stole my family from me.

After years of living in an abusive relationship, I just couldn't make decisions anymore. Everything was always so complicated with him, I had been so often surprised by his reactions that when I had to decide something, even something simple, it made me panic. My self-confidence in my judgment and my perceptions was at zero. After a colleague first told me about your services, it took years for me to decide to call because I was so... broken. Luckily, she understood me and, most importantly, she never pressured me.

We have been separated for 5 years, but I am still being told that I am an incompetent mother, that I have no ambition, that I am a lost cause. He blames me for the separation despite the fact that he denigrated me throughout the relationship.

We posted the SOS-INFOs on the bulletin board of the shelter. Several women read them and asked for copies. They find them clear and relevant because they recognize their experiences. -Intervener at the shelter for women victims of intimate partner violence.

I am constantly preoccupied with how he may react. I have to hide certain parts of my life from him so that I don't disappoint him (for example, if I smoke a cigarette with friends, even though I «officially» quit three years ago when he gave me an ultimatum). When I do something that he doesn't like, I am the worst person in the world, selfish, a liar, self-centered, etc.

He hit me in the stomach, really hard, when I was a few weeks pregnant. He said afterwards that it would be my fault if I lost the baby.

When I'm at work, my husband calls and texts me constantly. If I don't answer, he insists and texts repeatedly, every 3 seconds. It's difficult when I'm with clients, with colleagues or with my boss. I've already been reprimanded for this. It's really stressful for me.

He forged my signature many times, on contracts, personal loan applications, and to try to sell the house without my knowledge.

He constantly questioned my intelligence, my memory and my mental health: «I never said that! You're making up stories!» «Seriously, you should go to the doctor, you're not right in the head!» «Look how you're reacting!» «You're always mixing things up, you must be starting to get Alzheimer's...», «You don't even remember what you told me! You're so dumb!». Woman 54 years old "

Thanks to the «It's not violent» website, I was able to increase my student's awareness of the subtle violence found in intimate partner violence, which is often banalized and ignored. My students really liked a first workshop in class and I then organized thematic lunchtime meetings for the other four vignettes.