Testimonials 102

One evening, after a particularly difficult week, I asked my abuser to drive me to a hotel room. He was laughing, certain that I would call him back the next day to pick me up. When the door closed on his burst of laughter, I looked my assistance dog in the eyes to reassure her. I was so glad that she was there with me! I stared at the arms of my wheelchair for a long time, vowing to myself that my multiple sclerosis would not make me call him back because I needed his help. I chose to take a big leap into the void to change my life. This moment is forever etched in my memory, it is the turning point in my life.
  • Woman
  • 44 years old
  • Psychological violence, Emotional violence
During the lockdown I was forced to work from home for a year and a few months. It was hard though, I never got a break from what was going on at home. When we started to go back to the office, he told me that my job "clearly" didn't require me to be on site and that I had to find a way to convince my boss to let me continue to work from home... but I wanted to go back. The worst thing is that I risk losing my job if I insist too much... I feel so stuck.
  • Woman
  • 48 years old
  • Psychological violence, Economic violence
"When we first met, I hadn't yet come out to my family. He told me that he wasn't planning on «gaysitting» and that if I wanted to go out with him, I had to tell my parents. I had decided not to go out with him for this reason, but he kept coming on to me and we ended up going out anyway. A few months later, my mom called me and she was crying...she had received an email from him, telling her about our relationship. A little later, he told me that he had warned me that if I was going out with him I had to tell my parents... and since I hadn't, he was within his rights to do so...
  • Man
  • 23 years old
  • Emotional violence, Violence by proxy
We had been married for a few years when I realized that I was being abused by my spouse. She was constantly insulting me no matter how much I cared for her. It was especially complicated because I worked in her father's business. The first step I took to get out of it was to talk to a counsellor. After a few months, I quit my job for another one, which helped to sort things out a bit. A few years later, we separated.
  • Man
  • 46 years old
  • Emotional violence
As soon as I disagreed with him, as soon as I didn't do a thousand contortions to get into the mold, I became a «fucking bitch». He said it softly, between his teeth, with an air of disdain. It was imprinted in my mind and even today, long after we broke up, I can still hear it in my head. He did many other things to me, including physical violence on several occasions, but what struck me the most were these two little words «fucking bitch».
  • Woman
  • 43 years old
  • Psychological violence, Emotional violence
I learned at 28 weeks of pregnancy that I had placenta previa and that I had to stay in bed but my husband refused. He forced me to do the housework and the meals under the pretext that it was my job and that I was a coward. On his birthday, he invited several friends to dinner and I had to prepare a large meal despite the instruction to stay in bed. After dinner, I had to do the dishes before I could go to bed, even though I had an extreme stomach ache. The next day I had a hemorrhage and was hospitalized for the rest of my pregnancy.
  • Woman
  • 21 years old
  • Emotional violence, Indirect physical violence
I ended a toxic relationship after 6 years of lies, manipulation, verbal and physical abuse. He did not accept our separation and kept harassing me. After 3 months of harassment, I filed a complaint with the police for assault and criminal harassment. He pleaded guilty in the municipal court 15 months after the beginning of legal proceedings. I testified in court before he was sentenced and despite the fact that it was very difficult, I was proud to have done so. Today, I am at peace! -Mimi
  • Woman
  • 49 years old
  • Physical violence, Bullying
I used to feel sorry for him despite the fact that he hit me because I thought that he had suffered violence himself as a young child. When I learned that he had lied to me about pretty much everything for 6 years , it made me think that he must have lied to me about his youth as well to use it as an excuse for his violence. -Mimi
  • Woman
  • 49 years old
  • Psychological violence
When buying a little pajama set for your unborn baby becomes a crime... When every limit is forced... exceeded... Physically, sexually, psychologically...Through money, social networks, constantly moving from town to town... It's violence. Today, I am safe with my son. I hope my testimony can make a difference for someone.
  • Woman
  • 25 years old
  • Psychological violence, Sexual violence, Physical violence
I arrived in Canada 4 years ago. My husband took my passport and the children's passports and hid them. He told me that my children had been accepted for immigration, but not me... and since I didn't have the papers, I couldn't go out because I would get arrested. I was very afraid of the police because in my country there are a lot of corruption and violence. In addition, I didn't speak French or English. I stayed for two years in the House, always afraid of being sent back to my country and separated from my children. When I became pregnant, I had difficulties and had to go to the hospital... the nurse quickly understood that I was terrified and found a way to speak to me alone with an interpreter. She saved my life.
  • Woman
  • 27 years old
  • Psychological violence, Isolation
He was always looking for the smallest detail to criticize me. For example, once I had cleaned my apartment before he came over. Everything was clean. When he went to throw something out, he saw that there was cat litter in the kitchen garbage can. He didn't appreciate it and exclaimed: If you do that again, I won't come over anymore!
  • Woman
  • 29 years old
  • Psychological violence
It took us several years to get back on our feet, but now my boys and I are totally liberated and happy. We may have scars literally and figuratively, but we are serene. Peace of mind is priceless. We were very scared for our lives. The police, the Family Court, the legal aid lawyers were able to defend us. It has been a long and trying ordeal because the system is slow and sometimes not quite adapted to the realities of family violence. But your presence, your respect, your calm, your benevolence, your advice and care have propelled us towards freedom, far from violence. You told me to follow my instincts, to believe in myself... Even today, years later, your comforting words still guide me. You are truly, truly guardian angels, superheroes. Thank you on behalf of my two boys and myself. We are really happy today, thanks to the services of SOS and to the shelter. Violence makes no distinction of age, social background, education, cultural background. It is insidious, but not invincible.
  • Woman
  • 43 years old
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